Honey, you're a ten
Self-evaluations are the place to prove it.
‘Tis the season for recaps. You’ll find them on your streaming services, holiday cards, and every platform known to womankind. Your employer may also ask for one. Many businesses and firms, including most I’ve worked for, tack self-evaluations onto the end of the year.
You might be groaning right about now. I get it. You don’t have time to finish your million tasks in a busy season, and you’ve got your eyes on the prize of beach holiday in Boca Raton. You have the option to phone it in, but I implore you: don’t. Your self-evaluation is your most important recap. It might be your most important job all year.
Even in my mousy years as a young attorney, I have always been a brazen self-advocate on paper. I find comfort in setting the stage and then supplementing that support at review time. This is how motions work: you attend a court hearing with the benefit of your motion papers, and they form the basis of your argument.
Not sold? Then let’s get real for a second. Women have no choice but to care about their self-evaluations—we are slighted professionally all the time. You cannot predict when you’ll be sitting across the desk from human resources wishing you documented your achievements better. This is your record, too. In fact, it’s the one they have no choice but to keep on file.
So, if I haven’t convinced you, then hopefully, I’ve guilted you. Either way works for me. Rest assured, a kick-ass self-eval doesn’t have to be painful. It can be prideful. And if you’re not employed outside of the home, I think you’ll still find some tools you can use any time you’re advocating for yourself.
Here are my best lessons for navigating the process this year and for years to come.
Use last year’s as a skeleton. You don’t need to start from scratch. Take advantage of the framework from your previous year’s self-evals. Most projects don’t just end because the fiscal year ends; they extend from year to year. See how much of that same content still applies and just build upon it. You might be further along than you expected.
“Spotify Wrap” your year. Numbers aren’t just for salespeople and workers with billable hours requirements. Many more wins can be quantified than meet the eye. When I moved in-house and no longer needed to bill, I still went through the effort to aggregate any stats I could for managers to easily digest my productivity. Such as, I settled 20 cases. I filed 12 motions. I attended 15 mediations. No one will do this work for you, but if you do it for them, you look fantastic.
Now isn’t the time to be humble! We tend to downplay our success out of concern for seeming overconfident. But the truth is, whatever your managers think of you, they’re already thinking it. If you’ve earned a ten, give yourself a ten. You’ve met all expectations—now set the stage so they can meet yours at your performance review.
But provide support. My most often-used phrase in any self-eval is “for example.” Every time you use an adjective to describe yourself, support it with hard facts from the year. Did you just refer to yourself as “helpful?” How are you helpful? Are you “organized?” How are you organized?
Break down your biggest assignments. Your most important, time-consuming, high-value projects deserve the most airtime. Pull them apart to really illustrate the work and responsibility that went into them. For example (heh), I spent a year working on one case that consumed about 40% of my bandwidth. In that 40% of my time, I worked on briefs, faced challenges with outside counsel, attended multiple mediations, and hired outside vendors for document maintenance. Again, don’t just call something your largest project—show it.
Combine your smallest assignments. Small projects deserve less airtime, but clump them together. It would be a loss to not mention them but a distraction to harp on them. I once assumed responsibility for a task that involved one-to-three email responses per day for a year, and my organization skills kept me consistent and prevented me from falling behind on them. Focus on your behavior and how it helped you be successful across all the finer points of your job.
Highlight what went wrong. Problems happen. Some are within your control and some are not. Write about them to: (a) shed light on a paint point your manager may not be aware of; and (b) show how you fixed them or are trying to.
Share the relationships you’ve built. Particularly if you are in a support role, find spots to work in the ways you’ve become a resource to people outside of your group. You don’t have to name names, but name departments. Managers will be impressed with how well you’re adding value across the board.
What is a “win?” Look beyond what it means on paper. Winning can also mean saving money, cleaning up a mess, reaching a finish line efficiently, or building trust with clients. I loved sharing this advice with outside counsel I worked with: “winning” does not only mean winning in court. Identifying a problematic case and pivoting to an early settlement would be a win I value just as much. So when you’re thinking about what you did well, think about viewing your success from as many vantage points as possible. This really showcases how well you understand the business you’re in.
Suggest improvements you can follow through on. Most self-evals will ask what you can improve on. Don’t use adjectives; meaning, don’t say you “hope to be more confident.” Stick to something tangible, like “I want to give a presentation this year,” so you can actually accomplish it. Otherwise, next year, you’ll find yourself twisting and turning to demonstrate how you achieved a nebulous goal that no one asked you to set.
Bring your whole self. Time for an honesty check: I never did this before the pandemic. I tried to avoid discussing my children at work to uphold this separate unshakable persona of me as a lawyer. But in 2020, I reached a tipping point. There was no distinction between Heather: The Lawyer and Heather: The Mother anymore. I couldn’t stomach the notion of brushing my personal life off the Zoom screen as if it wasn’t there. As if I wasn’t working harder to maintain the status quo than many of my peers. So, I told the truth. I was one of the only attorneys at my level with two small children during a global pandemic. My childcare was spotty—I was lawyering while mothering all the time. I refused to minimize that fact, because it spoke to my abilities as a multi-tasking, prioritizing attorney, who knows how to advocate for my needs and still get the job done.
Take notes. There’s no reason to wait until review season. Begin a new Word document each January and keep bullet points on the above as you move throughout the year. In the end, it makes the entire process insanely simple.
Take it with you. Unless you have a document return policy that forbids this (how’s that for a disclaimer?), keep your self-evaluations. Your wins form the basis of your future cover letters. Who knows where else they’ll lead you.
This is the first December I haven’t worked on a self-evaluation in 12 years. But those of us who work outside traditional constructs or in the home still have room for self-reflection. I’ll go first.
In 2022, I leapt. I quit my corporate job in September to work with my husband. I transitioned my oldest to public school and my youngest to a big girl bed. I volunteered. I survived illnesses and planned memorable vacations. I made more friends. I still drink too much wine and don’t know how to relax. I am still shopping for the perfect crossbody bag. I am leaning into Our Tiny Rebellions in ways I didn’t foresee, pressing on uncomfortable topics and pushing my own limits. I am hoping to build this community bigger, faster, and with more intention in 2023. So, I’m giving myself a 7/10, because in this new life of mine, I’ve got room to grow.
I’m excited to hear if this helps you! LMK: averagejoelle3@gmail.com.
The little things
The minute we turn the heat on, I am dry. Everywhere. My body is a Sham-Wow. But instead of living as an arid shell of myself, I’ve invested in the following products that really help (from left): Mario Badescu Coconut Body Butter; Glossier Balm Dotcom; Ouai Hair Treatment Masque; Caudalie Resveratrol-lift Firming Cashmere Moisturizer; and Glossier Hand Cream.
Also
I read:
Deb Perelman Could Do This Forever – Romper
My boyfriend, a writer, broke up with me because I’m a writer – The Guardian
The “It Won’t Collect Dust” Gift Guide – 5 Things You Should Buy
I bought:
The perfect Hanukkah gift for my seven year old: the Self Care Nail Kit by Super Smalls, which includes peel-off, non-toxic polish, nail stickers, and even a little fan dryer. Too cute.
I watched:
The second-to-last episode in season 2 of The White Lotus. I have death predictions but won’t spill them here, so let’s put some respect on Aubrey Plaza’s wardrobe instead.
Your wins
One of my closest friends from childhood, Natalie, goes in for brain surgery today. I’m in awe of her strength and manifesting this win. Please put some good juju in the air for her. Thanks :)
Begin a new Word document in January!!! This is brilliant and such an ah-ha moment for me. Thank you!
These are amazing tips. Well done.